Sunday, July 25, 2010

Letting go of my other family

I already know how hard it is going to be to let go of the family that is here in Hawaii. Hard. I have cried so much about it and so often that I pretty much thought I was cried out. Not that I think the move is the wrong thing....but that doesn't necessarily make it easy. And I do think that is true about much in life ; sometimes it is the most difficult choice that is the right one. Ok, so I know in advance I will mourn those I leave here.
What suprises me is how much I am going to miss my church family. I only returned to the Catholic church about 2 years ago after close to 40 years away. When I returned I didn't want it to be partially, I wanted it to be a complete return. That meant that my marriage to John needed to be con-validated by the Church and I still needed to be confirmed, something usually done when you are 12 or 13...not 56. For a year I attended RCIA classes at St. John's and I am so glad that this specific church is where the Lord led me. The teaching I received isnt something I would have valued or understood had I been an adolescent. What a blessing and what a gift...not only to return to the Lord but to have a great sponsor ( thank you Stan ) , a great group of classmates and a loving and dynamic teacher ( thank you Deacon Wally ). Maybe its just being more sensitive to the leadings of the Holy Spirit but I am so connected to my church family and it cuts to the quick to be leaving them too. I can go to so many of them ( and I have often ) and ask for them to pray...for my family, for myself, for following where the Lord leads....and they pray. I am loved and I know it and can see it and can feel it. I am going to miss this part of the Body of Christ.

Thursday, July 22, 2010

The packing ...+2

It has been two days now since the movers came to pack us up and I think I can finally talk about it.
Leading up to the big day were innumeral days of grief. What we were doing was disassembling the life we have lived for the last 30 years in this house. Not to say we aren't taking tons with us..we are. It just won't fit the same way ; not a bad thing , just different.
I did not realize what a creature of habit I am....and a messy creature at that. Just cleaning out the junk drawers ( no irony there, right?) revealed that much of what was in there was garbage. Why was it in there? Also, the drawers were filthy...ack. What other filth do I live with that I ignore or "choose" not to see?
I digress.
On Tuesday the movers showed up at 9am. We had expected them at 7:30 but no problem. There were three men....again , no problem. Then two of them left.
One guy, working by himself from 9am till almost 1pm when the other two showed up again. I must say that the one young man who worked by himself had done an amazing job and that the other two were nowhere near his level of competence when it came to the packing. Nevertheless, it was after 4 pm when they left the house and all things considered, it could have been worse.
A few things came immediately to light, literally. First was the dirt under where the couches stood. Truth be told, it was not as bad as I had feared. What came to mind were the skeletal remains of small creatures , lost holiday candy ( it could have been halloween, Christmas or Easter ) and pine needles. Always and ever pine needles...a different story. I was right on two out of three ....candy ( we think it was Easter by the wrapping ) and pine needles. And hair...both dog and human. The second realization I had was the fact that there was alot more floor that had to be vacuumed and mopped now that the furniture was gone. Also, there is an unnerving echo : )
Those floors are mopped. Now for the rest of the house.....

Sunday, July 18, 2010

Does it never end ???

I started going through cabinets, closets, drawers, shelves and whatever else could be gone through two weeks ago and if I press hard I just might be ready Tuesday morning when the movers get here. The bad part....who knew we had so much JUNK ..ok not all junk and to someone down the road it may well be treasure. The good part old silver lining so to that I am finding things I thought lost years ago. I have found 1 glove whose mate was tossed a few years back, a sandlewood fan ( dont know where it came from nor to whom it belonged ) , the pants to a gorgeous velvet pantsuit - the top got donated to Goodwill with the last yard sale, ski socks, 3 of 5 metal measuring cups ( probably made of lead or another heavy metal )...well the list of fun finds is almost endless.
But not quite. I do believe there is an end in sight since there is not much else to go through. The living room is stacked high with only a narrow corridor to walk through to the kitchen and the kitchen table is stacked high with everything breakable I own which the movers assure me wont get broken. The movers tell me this will only take one day. Okie dokie, if they say so.

Saturday, July 10, 2010

Not a clue....

We are now in the process of getting ready for the movers to come in 10 days....which means going through the detrius of 37+ years of accumulated stuff. Some of it belonged to my grandparents (definately keep) , some of it my mother (definately keep) but for the most part it is ours. Now by that I mean mine, John's , Tessa's, Tia's, Josh's, Melissa's and Zack's. And for the most part I am good...I generally do remember to whom it belonged , what the occasion was and why I have held on to it for all these years.
However, there is another catagory....not only do I not know A) why I kept it, B) to whom it belonged (although it MUST have been important, else why would it still be here among the treasures?), or ...this is the best one... C) what in the name of all that is holy it is, was or why I kept it. Not a clue.
Ah well.....I just hope that a year or two down the road I don't have an " ah ha " moment as to what said treasure was and wish I had not consigned it to the trash.
Hopefully my memory lapses will continue unabated and that will not happen.